Ok, so I did my initial training on Saturday, and it was mind-numbingly boring, but apparently necessary. It's computer based, so I didn't have to strain myself physically. However, if you imagine the most useless, common-sense, boring and totally uninteresting 4 hour lecture (with pop quizzes every half hour) that you can think of, what I did on Saturday was it. Even so, after leaving the store on Saturday, I was optimistic about my next scheduled day, and the rest of my employment at (name of national electronics chain removed for the protection of the guilty).
Fast forward to today, my second day "on the job." On the job is in quotes because I didn't actually do any work, just more computer based learning. Instead of common sense bullshit that a trained monkey could regurgitate on command, today's 6 hour lecture was on product knowledge, selling techniques, and customer service. Of course, those are the buzzwords that the training program uses. Here's what they really mean.
Product knowledge: stuff you can learn about by reading a manual, a website, or the goddamn box. Being a Product Specialist apparently entails knowing just enough to impress the shmucks who come in the store, but not actually having any useful knowledge that you could use in a discussion with an actual expert.
Selling techniques: getting people to buy shit that they wouldn't buy on their own, but have been convinced that they "need." Don't get me wrong, getting an extended warranty on a big screen TV is a very good idea, but that same extended warranty for a 90 dollar VCR, or "Monster" AV cables and power supplies that cost 2-20 times as much as normal cables and power supplies (and do the exact same thing) is fucking ridiculous. Besides, if you really want quality audio equipment, don't come to fucking (name of national electronics chain removed for the protection of the guilty).
Customer service: the training program uses this term to refer to things like home theater installations, or DirectTV recommendations. As if anybody with an instruction manual can't hook up a surround sound system to their TV/DVD player, (name of national electronics chain removed for the protection of the guilty) wants folks to pay 150 bucks or more for somebody to come over and do it for them. When we sell a TV, we're supposed to push DirectTV. "Hey look, this guy just spent 3 grand on a big screen, lets sucker him into a 1 year agreement for satellite television cause his cable connection won't take full advantage of the increased resolution!" Give me a fucking break. I've got satellite TV, and while I agree it can be cheaper than cable, it certainly doesn't look as good. If you don't know what I'm talking about, imagine watching streaming video on the net. Notice those occasional blotches of pixels? That's what satellite TV looks like. In other words, like ass.
While I was doing my "training," I got a good cross-section of my co-workers opinions on the job and the managers as they came in and out. Apparently, everyone hates working there. Unless they're a manager (which there seems to only be about 4 for 25 or so regular employees), they're not full time, and yet they're working close to, if not more than, 40 hours a week. One guy's been working there for six months, and has been the top performer in his department since he started. So, he's close to being promoted, right? No, he's not even full time.
The managers also don't seem to do much managing unless someone fucks up (e.g. calls in sick, comes in 2 minutes late, or forgets to offer the extended warranty). I suppose I can understand the lack of support for the established employees, but I've been there two days (for a total of 11 hours), and I've talked to my manager 3 times (and seen him 4 times). Hell, I haven't been given the official uniform (a red polo), nametag, or sign-in sheet. I really hope they don't expect me to be doing this training voluntarily, because I expect to get fucking paid for this bullshit.
So here's what I'm thinking: my job search is in no way over. I've got a fucking degree, for christ's sake, and I'll be damned if I'm going to be a fucking clerk at this point in my life. As soon as the economy picks up and I get a better job, I'm gone. I might not even wait that long. (name of national electronics chain removed for the protection of the guilty)'s a good store to shop in, but it fucking sucks to work there. (EDIT (10/10/2005): Upon further review, it's not a good store to shop in, either. After my experience working there, I have never since, and never will again, shop at this particular chain. I just won't.)
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