Good Movies? We Don't Want Em

I know I've already talked about it, but Serenity was a great movie. Not only do I think it's the best movie I've seen this year (and will probably hold on to that title), but it's easily entered my Top 10 of my favorite films of all time. Why, then, did it go 3 and out? I suppose it's still showing in some theatres, but not any near me. After 3 weeks. I bet Star Wars is still showing on a handful of screens somewhere.

I can hear you now, "But Heath, Star Wars is so popular, no one's even heard of Serenity!" Well, why not? They showed ads. Critics liked it, they wrote reviews. It opened at #2. Everyone I know who saw it thought it was great. Someone had to fucking hear about it.

As I said, Serenity was great. But for any number of reasons, it failed to do as well at the box office as it should have ($23 million in 3 weeks). For the sake of comparison, let's look at the performance of some other films this year that are nowhere near the level of greatness that is Serenity.

Flightplan. Some shit about Jodie Foster and her kid on a plane. $74 million.

In Her Shoes. Cameron Diaz doing her stupid shit in a chick flick. $23.5 million.

Just Like Heaven. I didn't like it the first time when it was called Ghost. $47 million.

The 40 Year Old Virgin. Funny, but completely forgettable. $106 million.

The Exorcism of Emily Rose. I didn't like it the first time when it was called The Exorcist. Plus, it's not based on a fucking true story, alright? Neither was the Amityville Horror. It's based on made-up shit, which is what every other fucking movie that isn't a documentary is based on. Jesus Christ. $74 million.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I hate Johnny Depp. I also hate unnecessary remakes. $205 million.

Star Wars Ep III: Revenge of the Sith. Yeah, that's right. I said it. $380 million.

I could go on, but I won't. I think you get the picture. All of those movies made more than Serenity, and most of them aren't worthy of carrying Jayne's jockstrap.

Which brings me to my point. The American movie going public has no idea what makes a good movie. They know what they like, which is brain-dead, nonsensical drivel. So that's what movie studios give them, and that's what the theatres run. Genuinely good films like Serenity don't do well, and original, interesting films like Good Night, And Good Luck are never released to a wide audience. And that, gentle readers, is bullshit.